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Home Again, Home Again!

……..and not all is copasetic. There were bound to be some bumps in the road. But there were more than expected. We had someone looking after our apartment. Another person was sorting the mail. That’s in itself an overwhelming job, especially in December and January, when financial statements and holiday cards force postmen and women to carry heavy loads.

Even though most bills in France are paid by prelevement (automatic withdrawal) there are some that invariably aren’t. They’re the ones that scream, “Be still my heart.” Any envelope that has Ministry of Whatever (especially Impots (taxes)) stamped all over it, makes me perspire. While doing laundry, kissing our kitty, Victor and I grabbed two black plastic sacks and started sorting envelopes and tossing. Because we were jet lagged, we found ourselves stacking the mail according to priority and restacking it. Kitty was so happy to see us that she’d jump on the desk while we watched all of the papers hit the ground.

Tax notifications, insurance bills, new assessments from the Paris condominium association (nothing compared to the one in DC), etc., etc.: plus the bills we forgot to pay before leaving before our two-month-long trip, e.g., the trusty alarm system and the house insurance required checks immediately. We haven’t totally finished opening the mail but are down to the last bit -- meaning junk mail.

Then it will be time to assemble papers for last year’s taxes - an additional complication for Expats the world over. We’d never consider doing our own taxes since staying abreast of the tax treaties between various countries is way beyond our ability.  (Thank you Richard – you may NOT retire!)

Wish there were the equivalent of Paytrust.com in France. I’d pay a small king’s ransom to have a company receive and scan the bills. The French keep every paper from cradle to death – a habit I find impossible to comprehend since I’m the toss it out type!

An additional challenge of being an expatriate is dealing with paperwork from both sides of the ocean. French bank statements and American ones; Plus, I’m responsible for my mother’s finances so there are even more trees being cut to keep us informed.

January also means renewing press cards and our car registration - never a slam dunk experience. French bureaucracy is an inexact science that only a few people understand. I don’t pretend to be among them.

As if we didn’t have enough paperwork, we opened our precious suitcase where we packed the majority of the gifts purchased in China. Victor and I looked at one another and I started to cry. Gone were the cashmere scarves, sweaters, leather gloves, placemats, purses, Pashmina scarves, antique chops (signature stamps) and the list goes on. Being robbed once (between LA and NY) was insulting enough.  Being robbed twice (between Washington to Paris) is down-right outrageous. The irony is that our suitcases were inspected by security officials and had the tape and tags signifying where the deeds were done.

Victor called the airline baggage service, only to be informed that there was a wait-time of 801 minutes. That is 1.3 days. Clearly, we weren’t the only people complaining. After calling another number, we were given an address where we could send the claim. Since we assume that other people are making a few, we don’t anticipate receiving an answer anytime soon.

Victor asked if I had receipts. I could only laugh and say that where I was buying (often from here-today-gone-tomorrow markets), receipts, and much less credit card receipts, are unknown entities. The Chinese deal in figures and in cash. Ditto for vendors in India.

In Paris, one doesn’t bargain. In Asia, it’s part of the game.

We bought a lovely sculpture in Bangkok (if you go, try to book a room at the Peninsula Hotel)  http://bangkok.peninsula.com/ which is a hotel that has won all types of awards for both business and leisure travel. We had a wonderful time there, even though the city bears zero resemblance to its former self).   Thankfully the sculpture arrived intact which must mean that the inspectors weren’t impressed with our treasure.

We’re so busy taking care of paper work (how long do you think it will be before we hear from the airline and the other aviation authorities?) that I haven’t had the time to begin all of the forthcoming articles about our forays.

Born to Shop Suzy Gershman advises, “Buy a lot and then buy more.” How I wish we’d done that.  The main objects we managed to keep were ones we sent via UPS or the few packed in our carry-on luggage.

Even though I vowed I wouldn’t leave home anytime soon again, a return trip to Beijing and Shanghai is looking good. Needless to say, that would be before stopping in Los Angles to visit my brother, and Washington, DC to visit my mother and my more than precious granddaughter.

I wonder if I can get a wildly discounted ticket (the weather is cold and snowy in that part of the world)  - but dedicated shoppers……via  David)?

But, this time, I’m going to leave Victor home to take care of the mail.